I Can Just Be Me

It's a normal Friday, or so it seems to me. I have a LOT to get done today! I'm already flooded with thoughts of what I need to do, leaving me overwhelmed and tired before the day has even begun. Thankfully I knew what to do first (well, almost first...first, that is after getting dressed, chugging fiberwise, eye drops for the post-lasik eyes, french pressing the coffee, eating almond milk softened fiber one honey squares, packing a lunch [which I rarely do, but desperate times required it this morning] and trying to motive the crying child who didn't get enough sleep but needed to get dressed and off to school, kissing a few extra times the freshly-shaved Sean and sending him and the almost composed son out the door, checking and replying to a few texts, looking at my menu and grocery lists)...go sit with Jesus and tell Him all about it and listen to Him. I grabbed my hot coffee and my favorite blanket and sat in quiet (well, almost quiet...I hear a little one whimpering but he can wait just a couple minutes), ready and waiting.

I began to write down in my journal the thoughts that were on the forefront of my mind, stemming from a conversation I had last night with Sean as we dealt with some unpleasant attitudes coming from the back seat (and from within ourselves). What do I do with these attitudes?!!? My own quote was racing through my mind...Replace ATTITUDE with GRATITUDE. I began working through the various attitudes and and practical strategies for helping my kids (and me) find gratitude in those areas, God let me on a journey that started with gold (that's a blog for another day) and ended somewhere totally different but beautiful.

I opened my phone to look for something I had read on a blog recently about gold-mining in your children and I "stumbled" across a link to Laura Story's song "I can just be me." I began to listen to it and it was like God "walked" into my house and was right next to me. I didn't even know how to say what I felt, but she did for me. Through tears I just let the words pass through me and be my prayer. In such a beautiful and simple way, my normal day turned into a special day...that God can be God and I can just be me today. The attitudes seem so small in comparison to the power of this truth. I'm only left with gratitude and peace. I know I still have to live the rest of my day, but I'm starting from such a better place...I think I will be playing this song ALL day today. Maybe you can too.


"I Can Just Be Me"
by Laura Story

I've been doing all that I can
To hold it all together
Piece by piece.
I've been feeling like a failure,
Trying to be braver
Than I could ever be.
It's just not me.

So be my healer, be my comfort, be my peace.
Cause I can be broken, I can be needy,
Lord I need You now to be,
Be my God, so I can just be me.

I've been living like an orphan,
Trying to belong here,
But it's just not my home.
I've been holding on so tightly,
To all the things that I think
Could satisfy my soul.
But I'm letting go...

So be my father, my mighty warrior, be my king.
Cause I can be scattered, frail and shattered,
Lord I need You now to be,
Be my God, so I can just be me.

Cause I was lost in this dark world
Until I was finally found in You
So now I'm needing, desperately pleading
Oh Lord, be all to me

And be my savior, be my lifeline, won't You be my everything.
Cause I'm so tired of trying to be someone
I was never meant to be
Be my God
Please be my God
Be my God
So I can just be me
So I can just be me
I can just be me. 

List to the song here!

He chose. I choose.

The boy who chose to follow Christ and be different even at a young age when few were walking the paths he did, didn't know that a girl next door was praying for someone just like that.

1.      He chose Jesus instead of the world.

2.      He chose purity instead of selfishness.

3.      He chose to explore, understand, create, build, design, instead of laziness.

4.      He chose to seek out and listen to wisdom instead of pride.

5.      He chose to work hard and save his money instead of spend it all.

6.      He chose to use his musical talents to worship God instead of the applause of man.

7.      He chose to enjoy his family instead of be too cool for them.

8.      He chose to work doing what he loved instead of what could make him the most money.

9.      He chose to do what he said he would do, instead of good intentions.

10.  He chose to find the good in a situation instead of pessimism.

11.  He chose to laugh, and laugh a lot, instead of taking life too serious.

12.  He chose to make jokes instead of boredom,

13.  He chose adventure instead of contentment.

14.  He chose to embrace a bigger worldview than himself.

15.  He chose to repent and turn instead of stubbornness.

16.  He chose to hide God's word in His heart instead of sin.

17.  He chose to care more what God thought than what people did.

18.  He chose to be real instead of fake.

19.  He chose to take care of his body instead of abuse it.

20.  He chose to invest in what matters to him and God instead of what's cool.

21.  He chose to dare to dream big instead of doubt.

22.  He chose to travel the world instead of settle.

23.  He chose to try new things instead of get "stuck in his ways".

24.  He chose to learn people instead of judge.

25.  He chose to be bold instead of passive.

26.  He chose to be weird instead of normal.

27.  He chose to think before he acted.

28.  He chose to live instead of die.

29.  He chose to give instead of take.

30.  He chose to receive instead of resist.

31.  He chose to be Sean Douglas Rassi instead of someone else.

  32.  He chose me, Kristina Kay Rassi, as his lifetime friend and lover. With all of the choices he made that led up to that day, how could I resist? I couldn't and I still can't. He still chooses these choices every day and they have helped make him into the man that I love sharing life with. God uses him every day to show me Jesus. I'm so thankful he chose.
 

I chose Him.

He chose me. 

I chose him.

I choose Sean.

I will always choose Sean.

Little choices take us big places.

32 Choices and a Happy 32nd Birthday to my man!

"You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you so that you might go and bear fruit—fruit that will last—and so that whatever you ask in my name the Father will give you."          John 15:16